K/H: Outline Fixes

This is what we talked about today:

1. Transform thematic subjects into theme statements which reflect the complexity of the piece. Stay away from obvious statements ("Hard work can lead to a great outcome.") and clichés ("Things aren't what they seem.")

Fix it: Go back and review the characters and situations that gave you the idea in the first place. Reread a few things. Look at my "How to Write a Thematic Statement Notes" a few times. Consider communicating some of the complexity in your piece by adding a dependent clause. Google a list of subordinating conjunctions (colloquially called "AWUBIS" words) and see if any of those words help you put your thoughts into words. Writing great thematic statements is hard, guys. It takes a lot of time and revision. Over the next day or so, I'll be fixing my outline (Mrs. Wise's Project) so that my thematic subjects are turned into theme statements. 

2. Consider your religious connections.

Think about it: This is a persuasive presentation. You're trying to convince me. If you don't know much about the religious allusions in your texts, then you may want to excise those from your outline. You are, of course, allowed to do research if you'd like to pursue these religion-based connections. 

3. Add commentary to everything.

Fix it: Add commentary to every connection you've made. Every. Single. One. What does it mean? Why is it important? Does it reveal something about a character, a conflict, or a detail about the context or setting? Hint: If there's no meat on the bone, throw it out. We'll talk tomorrow (Wednesday) about narrowing down the scope of your presentation. 

4. Make it persuasive.

Fix it: Consider the rhetorical triangle you drew today in class. 

• Logos is logic, reasons, evidence, quotes, commentary, all that good literary analysis you're writing. Considering the academic context and tone of your presentation, it is appropriate that logos is the primary means through which you attempt to persuade. Don't forget about ethos and pathos, though. 
• Pathos is an appeal based on an expected emotional response from the audience. I am your primary audience. You know me. What kinds of things does Mrs. Wise care about? Mexican food and nerd culture, of course. But more importantly, you know that I am interested in all aspects of the teacher-student paradigm, as well as issues related to education (in all aspects of your life, not just school) and character development. 
• Ethos is a little more difficult to pinpoint. Ethos is the credibility of the speaker. It is based on an assumed shared set of values between the speaker in the audience; developing a feeling that you're on the same side because you have the same goals, the same values. What can you do to enhance your credibility?